What Your Stuff Says About You

In this episode of Coffee Break With KA & Dana they talk about What Your Stuff Says About You.

According to Psychology Today, arguing about taste is as fundamental as having it in the first place. We take for granted that different people enjoy different things—and that others feel as confident in their judgments as we do in ours. Our choices in books, music, art, and design go to the core of who we are. In this episode, KA and Dana discuss:

  • What your stuff says about you
  • What having a lot of books says about you
  • What your taste in music, art, and movies says about you
  • How your taste in music relates to your intelligence
  • Whether authors are introverts or extroverts

KA is an author of lesbian fiction with degrees in counseling, psychology, and social work. She writes stories about lesbians, burdened by past trauma, who find healing in the love of a soul mate.

Dana is an avid reader, a recovering alcoholic, a fisher-woman, and a graduate of the school of hard knocks.

As co-hosts, they’re quite the duo. Connect with them online at www.kamoll.com

Music in this episode (Lucky Way) is licensed for use in various multimedia applications by Melody Loops. 

Listen to this episode here


please note this transcript has not been edited and is automatically generated meaning certain words will be incorrect

[Music] welcome to coffee break with KA and Dana were brought to you by the lesbian talk show I’m KA a lesbian romance author and in my past life counselor and a social worker and I’m Dana an avid reader coffee connoisseur recovering alcoholic and a graduate of the school of hard knocks grab a cup of coffee pull up a chair join us for a meaningful conversation from a lesbian perspective argument about taste is as fundamental as hat we take for granted the different people enjoy different things and that others feel is confident in their judgments as we do ours in this episode KA and Dana discuss the topic of taste and what it reveals about us won’t you join us for a meaningful conversation all right so we’ve kind of got a fun topic this week talking about people and their tastes or people in their stuff kind of light-hearted compared to our last couple did you like we read an article as we often do did you like it um it was very interesting to me to to put myself in the article to see where I fit but also others yeah you you it was a long article from Psychology Today and it really did have a lot of details it hit the high points for each of them I mean you didn’t go into a lot of depth but enough for us to have I think a good conversation yeah but the title of the article is what your stuff reveals about you yeah and really it I guess you could say it talked about stuff but mostly to me it talked about personal taste I would agree with that because when I think of stuff I think of the things you collect you know how many t-shirts you have in your drawer how much what your desk what just looks like how much junk you have on your garage shelf that kind of stuff yeah it really didn’t talk too much about that it talked about personality types and a lot about how the different personalities like different types of music and art yeah whoever wrote this article really liked art and music okay so the oh of course I looked at it kind of from a psychology perspective and it certainly broke it down but but it talked about let’s just let’s just hit some of the high points so open people it said that their living space contains more books more CDs more DVDs than non open people or less open people that their collections of those things are more eclectic and it suggested that that those folks will sometimes become artists let’s open you know the main thing that hit me was those are your nostalgic folks who you know remember things from childhood the shows they watched or whatever and that’s their taste now they like those old movies and those little characters and those kind of things so my thought was you fit in the open category actually that was that was my thought too and my wife I couldn’t have you know yet I’m sure you thought about Wendy at the same time because I couldn’t help but think about Kay as I hit these and really I mean like she’s so nostalgic I mean her favorite shows are like Perry Mason and he still fondly remembers Howdy Doody um I she’s one I could see watching Murder She Wrote she loved Murder She Wrote back in the day but the one that she will watch over and over and over again are the old Perry Mason I can see that so you know I would from that standpoint she sounds like she’s less open but she owns like more books than the library I mean her idea fern it’s getting new furniture is a new bookcase I love your wife yeah I love her too so so really she’s a blend and in the end that’s what the article said right so how about I to where do you fall well at first I thought I fell into thrill-seekers a little bit okay so let’s tell him what that is those are like your those are like your folks you like action adventure movies they kind of watch less TV than other folks they like face-to-face encounters they need lots of stimulation right but then I cut down to the self medicate errs and the neurotics and I thought oh there’s my people I don’t even know where to go with that they’ve guessed meditators listen to a lot of music in their high in neuroticism they’re less emotionally stable people who are anxious sensitive and ez-up easily upset tend to be artistic creative and gravitate towards emergent emotionally turbulent art film song and literature often scenes is romantic and they like what they what they decorate their rooms with our inspirational posters and self-affirmations do fit there – oh just delete just a little oh you know what I was when I was good as what I thought came to mind and what I was gonna say and now I’m gonna say it anyway Trump oh I so don’t put you in the same category I tend to gravitate towards the positive I try I don’t always do it but I try and tend towards the positive where there is a positive word that comes out of Stumpy’s mouth okay okay so a positive self-medicate er okay see that should be we should tease that out like knee open people less open people so there’s positive and negative self-medicate huh I like that these are also folks that use music and art to impact their mood they feel sad they might do one of two things they either just get all into it and put some kind of a sad movie on or they cheer themselves up by putting on some upbeat music it’s it’s those folks yeah and you think you’re one of those huh yeah I think that category pretty well but as far as the music goes I love classical music and there’s nobody else in my family that likes it so I don’t get to listen to it very often but when I’m going downhill instead of uphill I know I listen to more classical music than I do normally okay so I can’t help but tie that something else that that we read in the article the the the more intelligent people and and this came out because it said that what you like has a genetic component but more intelligent people tend to like classical music so maybe that means you’re smarter than the rest of them I don’t know about that part but again I think you have to have kind of the open personality to be willing to look at other forms of music but you know because it’s not I these people that like just one genre of music I I look at them as clothes because they’re not open to anything new and I tell my wife all the time if you just listen to this music and hear it you would love it and she’s like and that made happening it isn’t isn’t that I mean it’s funny how that fit just with what what does this psychology article was talking about right I mean we do our tastes are are unique your you they’re uniquely our own right and yet we do our best to hook others on what we like and we make judgments about people based on what they like and dislike oh absolutely you know somebody rolls up next to me in the car with the bass and the thump thump yep I judge them and what research showed that that this that that those stereotypes that we use to make those judgments well a lot of times they’re wrong but sometimes they are right so there you go you eat and and we feel about those as strongly as we feel about the things that we love and you know I think as we get older our tastes open up a bit just because we’ve been around we’re not that old but just because we’ve been around longer we’ve been we’ve seen different things and have changed our mind on some things you think okay cuz okay not you take you do degree or degree you know some of it like like some of the the music I have liked over the years or movies that’s a good example for my wife and I we it’s rare that we settle on a movie that we both like it can happen but it takes considerable research to find just the right film because she likes she likes movies with things going on right action and I mean mostly she likes the mystery or something and I want tons of character development that’s what I want you can just have a movie that has all nothing happening and let me get to know that taxi driver or whatever so what’s your favorite movie then what’s your favorite movie Oh like absolute favorite okay so I’ll just take the one that comes to mind first Prince of tides tomorrow Streisand film that book was just heartbreaking oh but you got to know those characters in the movie that is one of those movies that although it’s a straight flick and they don’t tend to be drawn to the straight romance Mance’s son film but I am drawn through anything Barbra Streisand appears in so there you go that’s how I watched it but yeah you really get to know those characters you know that you do you do give me a good character development you know that and and that’s a piece of being introverts you know it the article talked about those folks that are reserved and thoughtful and self-reliant they tend to be the ones who are suckers for character development films and I kind of fit that into an introvert category a little bit do you think most authors would fit in that category because that’s what they look for I think but I don’t know that I suppose there are some authors who are extroverts they like you know right there yeah there are the people people but I don’t know I think most authors probably are introverts because they picked a craft that is solely a one-person craft I mean they have to sit down they have to be regimented to sit down at their computer and write by themselves yes it is a solitary activity for the most part and you know I as an author I mean you’re you’re in your character’s world you’re not really you’re not really too connected with the outside world when you’re fully engaged in writing at least that’s the way it is for me and see and that’s why I could never be an author I don’t there are so many were miniature I don’t know but I could I can’t sit down and write for hours at a time there’s too many squirrels going on in my head I’m doing good to sit down and do my meditation practice and and get through that without 9 million squirrels going through my head ok so you probably are more of an extrovert than an introvert because an introvert is really in you know focus of course that’s an internal focus too if you think about it watching the squirrels in your head that’s what authors do forget it we watch squirrels run around in our hand and we hear them say things and we write it down yeah yeah that is the craft ok I’m moving on in it there ok let’s just okay fun you asked me favorite movie what what’s yours um I loved the first Mamma Mia that’s probably one of my favorite movies I didn’t this much care for the second one but the first one it’s just a feel-good movie it just makes me feel good when I watch that movie ok and it in a way that’s thrill-seeker yeah but I thought we also had some good character development in it which any good film has to write and it had a great ending you know these movies that leave us with a down depressed ending I just can’t do them I mean I have walked out of two movies in my entire life I mean straight-up walked out of the theater one was do you remember what I want yeah one was pulp fiction and the other one was Saving Private Ryan okay okay I get that yeah they were not not my favorite films yeah they’re interesting you like rainbow and unifying things I’ll file that for future revenue no my unicorns and rainbows music what’s your prize love classical or even like some new agey instrumental stuff that’s my favorite yeah that falls into that really intelligent category with no words okay me too now we are there I don’t want any lyrics getting in the way of the music I listen to I’m more of a smooth jazz person you know like foreplay but okay alright art do you have do you like the art do you have a favorite artist I don’t know that I really have a favorite artist I like art but I’ve never been that much involved in art I you know I loved Rembrandt and you know and I loved some of some of the old stuff Renoir’s you know stuff like that that’s I think I like it just because it’s old and I try and figure out what they were thinking about when they were doing it and how long did it take them so I go to the other extreme I mean give me Salvador Dali I could hang Salvador Dali all the way around my writers studio that man was crazy and creative like Jackson Pollock he was crazy and crazy is crazy often goes with creativity I’m sorry to say we’ll just leave that one all righty all right all right since we’re playing this quiz thing nonfiction book do you do right dudu much you reach in nonfiction right now my favorite is probably the new Michelle Obama book loved it my wife my wife my wife really liked that one if I do nonfiction why I like nonfiction science and psychology but now pretty much if I read nonfiction it’s mostly related to writing so power of point of view by Alicia rice that’s always been your favorite we have discussed I have a ton of writing books all right let’s do fiction just for fun that’s what I write and that’s what you like to read a suit let’s all right let’s do Lisbeth nan mus BEC um it’s too hard in the lustick I have so many favorites yeah again there’s just no way to answer that question is there not talking to me you know I we won’t we won’t we won’t go down that aisle – I’ll tell you mine then you have Radcliffe patients bright fury we yet we thought shut that one before that was your first first love yeah kind of not the first less thick I read but the first one that I just fell in love with mainly because their character development of that perfect one that I can remember reading because I had no idea but in high school I read ruby feet ruby fruit jungle that that was my coming-of-age book for me very cool and on that note I think we’ve covered this topic well but but as a treat to you and the listeners okay this article said that the Romans may have gotten this right when they proclaimed I took Latin in high school here we go the Romans may have gotten this right when they proclaimed Augusta bus none s disputandum about matters of taste there can be no argument you’ve been listening to coffee break with KA and Dana meaningful conversations from a lesbian perspective we’re up to you about the lesbian talk show listen to us on pot bean and iTunes follow us on Twitter like us on Facebook until next week be kind to one another or car and watch amazing things happening in your corner of the world [Music]