How to Overcome Self-Doubt

How to Overcome Self-Doubt is the topic of this episode of Curves Welcome with Suzie Carr

Let’s get real about self-doubt for  a minute. Quite frankly, it spreads. What starts out as a slight hesitation, grows into an all-out war with your mind. It’ll play tricks on you. It’s a clever emotion like that. It’s one of those emotions that thrives on your avoidance. The only way to deal with fear is to face it. To view it as your teacher instead of adversary. And the most effective way to do this is to embrace it by acknowledging it and learning from it through a determined desire to grow.

Tune in to learn:

  • How to use self-doubt as your teacher
  • How to seize opportunities instead of fear them
  • How to get in the game and win instead of hanging on the sidelines and missing out

Listen to this episode

Transcript

please note this transcript has not been edited and is automatically generated meaning certain words will be incorrect

[Music] hey thanks for joining me today for this episode of curves welcome a podcast about facing and embracing the curves of life if this is your first time tuning in this is Suzie Carr the way to overcome something is typically to avoid it right to steer very clear of it so as not to give it more power than it already contains but what if we’ve got that all wrong what if the way to overcome something is to actually explore it more and acknowledge it now that might frighten some people but stick with me here for a moment when you face and embrace anything you take the power away from it and place it in your hands think about those moments in life when something scared the hell out of you and you ran in the opposite direction of it how did that feel did it empower you did you get to a new destination and feel comfortable knowing you may have tempered the flames looking at your angles for the time being but certainly you didn’t extinguish them you know that they are still burning their embers waiting on your return and unless you live in a vacuum you’re likely to return to those embers at some point by your choice or not by your choice what if you could face those flames from the onset and deal with them right then and there before they consumed any more of your energy you might think that standing before a fire could in fact burn you if you get too close to it you’re tempted to step back and let it have the power because it is more powerful than you at that moment it could burn you it could also burn everything around you if you allow it to burn out of control and when you backup from it and let it continue to grow it will likely get out of control and threaten to hurt you and those in your inner circle I know that this might be sounding a little bit melodramatic but at its core it is not overly dramatic it is truth what we allow to grow will take over allow weeds to grow and eventually they consume your plants allow a fighter to grow and eventually it destroys relationships allow self doubt to grow and it will eventually extinguish your light just like fire self-doubt can be havoc on your dreams for a fulfilling life self doubt comes in many forms and sweeps in without notice it steals the show takes over the stage burns out of control until only embers remain and those embers if not properly managed will continue to burn and overtake your light let’s get real about self doubt for a minute it spreads what starts out as a slight hesitation grows into an all-out war with your mind it’ll play tricks on you it’s a clever emotion it’s one of those emotions that thrives on your avoidance let’s face it it would be so much easier to walk away from something that makes you uncomfortable than it would to stand before it we have all been there at some point when something scorched our emotions and banished us from being able to access something that we once desired I like to use public speaking as an example here it is more fear too than death by the majority of people self doubt plays a major role in blocking people from reaching their full potential to express their ideas and insights by implanting itself in the forefront of the moment you may approach the podium or the group before you armed with a well-thought-out plan only to struggle to keep yourself upright because you go needs are knocking so hard it’s causing you to buckle maybe you can’t take a full breath and this causes your voice to do some weird wiggly thing or maybe you break out into a sweat the innate reaction to such extreme pressure is to bolt get the hell out of Dodge and find a media shelter and relief you can deal with it all later once you’ve got your wits back so many lost opportunities litter the stage once you’ve left it the opportunity to enlighten people is gone the chance to share something important destroyed to connect to honor someone to leave the site unchanged and better off all of those things are gone when you leave that stage out of fear and out of self-doubt Fair is the mother of self-doubt self-doubt is a total result of fear our fear of failing in some capacity drives us to doubt that we have what it takes to succeed at something in the case of a public speaking fear before you enter that room or climbed the steps to that stage fear embedded itself in your brain and begin to take over telling you to quit while you were ahead the only way to deal with fear is to view it as your teacher instead of your adversary in the most effective way to do this it’s to embrace it by acknowledging it and learning from it through a determined desire to grow I listen to Will Smith the other day he described his first time skydiving in his usual comedic fashion he entertained everyone with his build-up to that moment when he took the dive his self-doubt began to build the night before destroying any chance he’d sleep or for that matter eat the morning of when driving to the skydiving site he thought of his fear and wrestled with it allowing it to rake right over the present moment and destroy any chance of enjoying the time leading up to that jump he feared the potential outcome and then the doubts covered him in a film that blurred everything after he jumped when he was gliding through the air he said it was the most a blissful moment he has ever experienced on the other side of his self-doubt lived absolute bliss a bliss that could only be accessed by embracing the fear and the doubt I don’t know about you but I don’t want to waste my life sitting idle on the side of the road as a doubtful spectator I want to experience the Bliss one can only access by getting in the game and telling the doubt to go burn itself out on the other side of the road and if you desire that same level of living then let’s take a look at some practical ways that you can toss doubt away so it’s no longer an obstacle in your life but a teacher or a pathway to growth so I want to share with you two ways that have helped me extinguish those flames of self-doubt and reduce it to mere ashes one way to overcome doubt is to acknowledge its presence by simply acknowledging it you are telling it that you know it is there and you are going to stand your ground you refuse to take a step back because it happens to sit before you think of it as a tangible obstacle that is literally blocking you from living your life in a way that gets you that blissful deserve it feeling would you let someone keep you from less I hope not just like a person or a lodge freaking Mountain face it and figure out a way to work with it instead of avoidance bring a spirit of collaboration into the mix partner with it instead of avoid it be willing to analyze it dissect it and learn from it respect its power but don’t give in to it you’re listening to the lesbian talk show the lesbians or choke on your hub of podcast information the second way to overcome self-doubt is to ask the right questions of it seek to understand it go into research mode to uncover its power source many times doubt turns up as a looming presence that tells us we’re not good enough we’re not a good enough partner we’re not good enough at our job we’re not good enough to present that proposal we’re not good enough to earn that salary we’re not good enough to teach that course we’re not good enough to be an influencer you know what I say to that I say screw that negative self-sabotage nonsense that’s what it is it’s complete nonsense you may not have the answers the talents the abilities or the means to make everything stick in life but if you have a beating heart if you have air in your lungs and the heart to want to learn something you most certainly can and you owe it to yourself to do so make it happen open a book Brow’s insightful articles find a mentor take a course hell in this age of technology there is no excuse to not have an access unless you live under a rock don’t allow self doubt to rob you of your potential if you truly want to do something go and do it we have all had to learn new skills to achieve things there is seldom a shortcut to get from point A to point B that sticks anyway I mean sure luck plays a factor in many situations but at the end of the day it’s your resolve to learn new things that will get you past the breaking points past the obstacles past the naysayers that tell you that you are not good enough stop listening to them stop listening to that nonsense and know that you have it within you to learn anything you want to learn and when you learn you grow you can’t learn and not grow and it’s physically impossible when you stretch your brain you cannot under stretch it so stretch yourself learn and grow extinguish the flames of that self-doubt through acquiring knowledge because friends it is true when they say knowledge is power it’ll take you places that ignorance never can that avoidance never can that fear never can none of us are born with all the answers it’s in seeking those answers that we rise above a self-doubt and fear if you haven’t got a burning desire to do something in this world I don’t care if that’s planting a better garden given a speech asking for higher pay taking on a new adventure having a better relationship then you owe it to yourself and those who count on you to serve in their capacity to rise to the occasion by staring self-doubt in the face and saying either partner with me to get me to the next level or get the hell out of my way it is a choice so how are you going to choose hey friends thanks for spending time with me today first up I want to take a moment to say thank you to everyone who has showed their love and support of my newest novel release the pet boutique a romance novel that has lots of flirty innuendos a fun-loving albeit wacky at times family and a spirited dog who makes sure that everyone adores her it is available on Kindle and Kindle unlimited as well as paperback I also want to thank all who have become patrons of my patreon page your support means a great deal to me for more information on joining me on this journey and gaining access to special rewards visit the link in the show notes also be sure to follow the lesbian talk show to keep up on the latest episodes so thanks for tuning in until next time go out there and continue to learn grow and embrace life’s curves